Hi, Hello

I wrote a whole post. It was long and whiny and my baby woke up. I only have one typing hand now as my other one is holding a screaming baby. Great. Basically, this:

I thought motherhood would come naturally to me. It does not.
I thought I understood what colic was. I did not.

But what I have figured out is this:
Motherhood is not about what I thought I knew. Motherhood is not about me.
Being someone's mommy is about learning to be completely selfless. My whole existence, my whole world, revolves around this little human. At first I felt like a failure and wondered what was wrong with me. Then I realized that this is an enormous transition for someone whose life used to be their own. For the first time, I'm learning to serve out of love which is also something that does not come naturally to me.

I'm not perfect. More often than not, I get it all wrong.

He's learning how to be alive and I'm learning how to survive.

His name is Linus. My name is Tori.
This is our cranky, colicky, crazy adventure.